Random times with the kids

My youngest likes dinosaurs, right? I mean, he’s six, so that’s not really a surprise.

When I go to do the weekly grocery shopping, I typically take one child with me, this week it was him. While we were in the car he asked me how the people who lived with the dinosaurs had guns and the people after that didn’t. Now, this was brought on by a Jurassic World toy where some guy I don’t recognize had a net gun and a matching dinosaur. I had to start by explaining how the Jurassic Park, um, cinematic universe? is different from historical dinosaurs. I attempted to reinforce the idea repeatedly that humans and dinosaurs, especially the kind he thinks of, did not coexist.

Heck, most of the thing we think of as dinosaurs didn’t even coexist with each other. I did tell him that dinosaurs lived millions of years ago, a time frame I can’t really process well as an adult. That time scale just isn’t relevant to everyday life.

He also asked how we went from having no humans to having humans which is difficult in the sense that I don’t know the exact timeline or sequence of events. I simply tried to explain the basic idea of Darwin’s theory of evolution and how we were one or more species of ape that slowly became something resembling humans over time. Not really a concept that’s 6 year old friendly, especially when the person explaining it is also attempting to drive.

I don’t know how we got there from this, but I also learned that he possesses a knowledge of Regular Show that’s roughly on par with mine. I asked him about several episodes with vague statements like “the one with the big floating head” and he was able to recall details, albeit different ones than myself. In that specific case I was struggling to remember the full initials of that character, until he said “Giant Bearded Face.” Initials GBF which stand for Garret Bobby Ferguson. There were other examples too, I was impressed.

He also spent some time watching Captain Underpants, a show which I’m not sure how to feel about. I’d say it certainly caters to his age group, give or take. I did not realize, however, that Captain Underpants is their middle aged principle that has been mind controlled with a ring or something? So the hero is a middle aged white dude running around in tighty whities. Yep, that’s not creepy at all. It apparently wears off when he comes in contact with water, for reasons I’m neither aware of or can be bothered to know. I dunno, I thought it was weird, but such is the way of things.

At some point I had to walk my oldest through the process of calling one of his friends on the phone. One of his class mates gave him his phone number so I figured why not. It’s really weird to realize that we use the phone so little that he had no idea how to operate it or the social expectations of beginning and ending a phone conversation. I’ll probably have to get him a phone of his own before to much longer though. I have no idea what age that’ll be a thing, but I figure it’s sooner rather than later.

Either way, that’s life with kids for you. Full of the most random and interesting moments. Always surprising me with how much they know and understand, though I probably don’t want to know how much or which parts get repeated to their friends at school.

Also Halloween is a thing. The youngest wants to be a pirate and the super safe thing they do in the town square is always on the day of, which is in the middle of the week. Horray for random hour(s) longer standing in line after work and before dinner with children that are simultaneously excited and bored. Such an irresponsible thing to do on a school night.

I’m gonna wander off now, stay safe out there and check all your smarties to make sure someone didn’t put a firearm in it.

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